Testimony about Shepherds Hill Academy

This testimony was found as a reply to a comment made by a parents to another student. All rights goes to the original author.

The harsh reality is that most wilderness programs are rampant with child abuse. It is very hard to explain how much trama SHF has caused me. People claiming I only say it because I am an evil lier trying to discredit a christian program don’t make it much easier. But SHF will not fear me into silence. I am opposed to your tactics of coercion and indoctrination. SHF takes advantage of the weak and vulnerable who are seeking help. Convincing them if they do not place their child in the program immediatly the child will be dead or in jail. This is a tactic all of these wilderness camps use.

There are plenty of programs that have been reported and even charged with child abuse (in some cases murder) and they continue operate. Many times they move to another state and change their name. How are these people still able to abuse kids? I do not know. Look at HEAL-online.org, watch the Capitol Hill briefings. The briefings include testimonys from, ex students of wilderness programs, parents of children who died in these programs, mental health experts, and Greg Kutz of the Forensics Audit Unit and Greg Kutz, Managing Director of Forensic Audits and Special Investigations for the US Government Accountability Office describes reports from two GAO investigations into the troubled industry for teens. Heres the link http://www.saferchildren.net/wilderness/capitolhill.html

Beatings for extreme reasons? My first day there I was unable to run up a hill. I was yelled at in front of everyone and swatted because I was unable to do it. This is just one case. i know ex students who had bruises that lasted weeks for asking why they had to do some meaningless task. The bible tells you to beat kids so that makes it ok? It also tells you to murder witches, stone disobedient children, and endorses slavery(shf?). I will assume you are ok with these things as well.

These parents pay tuitions that are the same as Ivy League schools. Yet the child is “treated” by special meals (I was on them for over a month and a half.) being told im a terrible human unable to be loved, my parents failed me, only if we work the program will we not die or go to jail or be a drug addict. These children with serious mental issues need real medical help from real doctors using real science that is backed up by peer reviewed medical journals. Your son or daughter may appear to be helped, but many more claim to be abused. Others are to afraid to say anything because they are afraid of Trace Embry and his cult. Every ex student I have spoken with claims it has taken them and their family years to overcome the problems and scars SHF letft them with.

You and SHF claim we are evil, demonic people that are simply trying to destroy SHF. This makes absolutely zero sense and is completely insensitive. What is there for me to gain from telling others I was abused at SHF? It is not easy at all. The reason I tell people and try to get the information out there is not because I am evil or have some sinister plan. The reason is very simple. I wish to prevent other children from being abused at the hands of Trace Embry in the name of science, medicine, therapy, and even Jesus.



Sources:

• Website where the original testimony was found (Reality is my religion)
• Factsheet about the facility (Fornits Wiki)

Vindication - about Mount Bachelor Academy

This testimony has been given by a former students as comment to an article about the closure of the school. All rights go to the original author

Having been a student at this school during it’s first 4 years of opening, it’s hard to describe my reaction to this news. Elated? Relieved? Perhaps vindicated is the best word to describe it. Though I did learn some useful tools and behavioral modification techniques, those pale in comparison to the horrible memories I carry with me, suppressed for years until I began working through them very recently.

I arrived at the school a very young, scared, self-loathing, 12 year old girl, who had already attempted suicide 3 times. I was stripped of the drop of self-esteem I had there, in the school’s process commonly known as “tearing the student down in order to build them back up”. When I arrived at MBA, I was on very strong prescription psychiatric medication. I met with a licensed psychiatrist twice during my 3 1/2 year stay. Once in the registration process, and one more time 6 months later. There were many times where the staff were “unable” or “forgot” to refill my medication, which, among other things, greatly effects the brain chemistry, as well as induces withdrawal symptoms. During the “lifesteps”, I was not allowed to take my medication, was only allowed 2-3 hours sleep, was forced to perform physical “emotional growth” acts to the point of exhaustion, was strongly encouraged, on a regular basis, to scream until my face was covered with purple spots of burst blood vessels, was consistently told I was “worthless, manipulative, a whore, a slut, a spoiled brat, unwanted by my parents” and other names I don’t care to share. I was 12 years old. The staff allowed other, older students to call me similar names while I was on a “self study” for kissing a boy, who was 4 years older than I. During the 3 month self study, I was not allowed to look at or talk to anyone, sat in a desk facing the wall in the dining area, was given writing assignments, of which 90% were about the “negative” aspects of my “soul” and personality–I still have 3 of those journals.

When I attended MBA, NONE of the staff were licensed in any mental health/child welfare/psychological areas. In fact, Sharon Bitz, now the Executive Director of the school, was hired as a Drama teacher in my second year at MBA.

I understand that others have had positive experiences at MBA, and I think that is great. The mental, and physical, abuse, the stripping down of my self-esteem, the pure negativity of my experience, however, has haunted my for over 15 years, and shaped me as a person for much of those years until I began to work through the issues brought on by MBA. For a few years after leaving MBA, I reached out to the staff for guidance and support in the very rough transition back into the “real world”. On MBA’s website, it is stated that every student who leaves MBA has “24 hour” access to staff support, and that the staff make it a “priority” to be available for the students. Not one of my calls were returned, not one of my letters were answered. It has been said by both professionals and fellow students that perhaps the staff were aware and “ashamed” at the way I was treated. That would be fine, except the main focus of the school is to take responsibility for your actions, but it seems that does not apply to the staff who enforce that. I also do not think it is a coincidence that more than 10 former students, 3 in my own peer group, have committed suicide or fatally overdosed on drugs.

My experience at MBA may be unique, and unlike any other student there. Yet reliving what I have not completely blocked out is incredibly painful; even as I write this, I have a lump in my throat and knots in my stomach. I was young, probably too young to be there. Yet I was accepted, and was subsequently treated as if I was similar to the other students, the average age being 16.

There is more to tell, unfortunately, but I think this entry has made my point sufficiently. I have stayed silent for far too long. I am more than willing to testify, under oath, and tell my story. Someday, I may even write a book, in detail, of my experience there.

So yes, I do feel vindicated.

The school closed in 2009 after the authorities intervened and closed it.



Sources:

• The original testimony found on Wordpress
• Factsheet about the school (Fornits Wiki)

Cborgeson at Mounth Bachelor Academy

This testimony was found as a comment to an article about the closure of the School. All rights go the original author known as Cborgeson

I also went to this school from June 2001-August 2002. While there were many great people who worked for this school, I can honestly say that none of the allegations are false…

I too had to take part in these “Lifesteps,” and was forced to watch some of my best friends be made to do strip teases in the infamous “french maid costume”, while the staff had all the other students yelling out derogatory comments… while the school has helped many children, at the same time, they also gave them plenty more complexes to worry about after the program. I can admit to being a difficult child, however, it does not warrant the different “methods” they use to “fix” problematic children, or at least this is what they lead the parents to believe. I’ve had this conversation with my own parents thousands of times, who sit there and claim that it saved my life… in some ways it did, in others, NOT SO MUCH-considering that I ended up in another program less than a year later.

The thing that saved my life, was maturity… not always doing everything that I feel like doing. staying out of trouble… turning 18 definitely saved my life. the one thing I took away from that experience was that I am not a VICTIM. I’m a SURVIVOR. They couldn’t take my spunk, passion for life, nor my dignity… no matter how hard they tried… I don’t know how to feel really, but I think that a temporary closure is at the very LEAST a step in the right direction.

The school closed in 2009 then the authorities intervened

Sources:

• The original testimony found on Wordpress
• Factsheet about the school (Fornits Wiki)

MM32 at the Monarch boarding school in Montana

This testimony was found on Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora. All rights goes to the author MM32, who made the original testimony

I attended the Monarch School in Montana (not Monarch "Academy," btw) from June 2009 to December 2010. I graduated the therapeutic program and came home with a few credits left to be able to complete high school. I've had about a year and a half to reflect back on my experience and I will say this: While I think some parts of Monarch are well-intentioned, I believe that it harms more students than it helps.

The therapy workshops, called "insights," are modeled after similar workshops seen at CEDU and the likes. (Do a google search for CEDU if you're interested in reading some scary stuff about places like this). There are 7 or 8 workshops I believe, most last a day long and consist of very strange therapy exercises. This includes screaming in a partner's face while pretending like they are your parents, getting on your hands and knees and being pushed down to the floor by a staff member and other students while you are supposed to resist, going around in a circle and telling your peers every bad thing you've ever said or thought about them, screaming while beating up pillows, standing up against a wall with your nose touching the wall for a long time while being told that the choices you make are leading you to "fear and death," etc. That list just a tip of the iceberg. These workshops were filled with all sorts of mind games as well as some seriously inappropriate breaching of boundaries, both physical and emotional. Not to mention students who had experience trauma (rape, abuse, etc.) were forced to talk about it with their peers within the first 2 months of being there, when they were still getting to know people, and with no licensed therapist present. In the very last workshop, an intense 5-day one, they had strict rules about not being able to bite your nails, sitting in a certain way, not masturbating when we got back into our dorms at night, etc. If you did any of these things, you had to stand up in front of everyone and admit it. It was very invasive.

On top of that, we were constantly told that if we talked about these workshops with anyone else who hadn't been through them -- newer students, random people, and even our PARENTS -- that there would be consequences.

The rules were over the top too. The dress code was very strict. There was the "only girl rule," which meant that a girl couldn't be sitting at a table with two other boys, but a boy could be in a group of all girls if he wanted. On one hand, physical contact with the opposite sex other than hugging was VERY against the rules, but people of the same sex were pressured into "smushing," which was their word for cuddling (putting a pillow between your open legs and letting a girl lie down on it, etc.). If you didn't smush with people, you would be seen as "resistant." If you developed a crush on a student and other people noticed, you were forced to talk about it in group therapy, where you would have to explain your entire sexual past to that person in front of everyone else, and then you were temporarily placed on "bans" with them, which meant you weren't allowed to talk to them, touch their belongings, mention their name, or even make eye contact with them. Bans were a specific punishment for other offenses as well.

We weren't allowed to listen to any music that the staff didn't like, watch TV, read the newspaper, watch the news, go on the internet unless for academic reasons and supervised, talk about popular culture, watch romance movies, pass notes, crack too many jokes, have a strand of hair in your face (for girls), have unmatching socks on, read comics, read any magazines other than sewing magazines, and use sarcasm, among other things. The rules were very invasive and included strange things like not being allowed to shave pubic hair. Students would get in trouble for things like drinking out of the same cup as a member of the opposite sex. Punishments included being on bans from the entire school (including not being able to look at anyone), being put in isolation (basically sitting at a table with just a notebook and not being able to participate in daily activities), work assignments (which included getting a meal taken away on certain days so you had more time to do physical labor outside), digging stumps out of the ground even if it was raining or snowing, etc.

Staff crossed many boundaries as well. Students were encouraged to share disclosures, which basically was a list of every "bad" thing they had ever done, and staff would do the same. This included sexual disclosures, so I ended up hearing graphic details of staff members sexual pasts during workshops. Staff members would also be physically affectionate with the students (i.e. "smushing"), give them back rubs, and knew every detail of your life and thoughts.

2013 the school became the center of the Free Madi campaign


Sources:

• The original testimony (Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora)
• To get madi out of an awful boarding school monarch school (Change.org)
• Datasheet about the school (Fornits wiki)

A testimony from an unknown CEDU like boarding school

This testimony was found on Reddit. All rights goes to the unknown author only known as "Survivor". Located in Idaho the school seemed to use methods as they were used by the now defunct CEDU-chain which closed after some lawsuits.

Using a throwaway here, since my other account links to my real identity. I went to one of these schools back in the 90's. I was one of a handful of kids that survived one of these "schools".

At the time, I was 16 years old, and had never done drugs or drank alcohol. I was one of the only Jewish kids that went to an Episcopal school in South and was kind of a late bloomer. At 16, I looked more like I was 14 and was about 5'6 120lbs. I spent a lot of time playing video games. Specifically, Gemstone and Ultimate Online. After my parents divorced I skipped a week of school.

Around 5:00am, I woke up to see to shadowy figures on either side of my bed. Without my contacts, I couldn't see very well. One of the guys said "Your coming with us". I was so panicked that I didn't even reach for my camping knife which was in one of the drawers, adjacent to my bed. The two men grabbed me when I was wearing nothing but my boxers and I hit one of them in the nose.

I was fighting for my life and it took both of them about 20 minutes to get me upstairs which was about 30 feet away. At that point, I saw my mom and my dad and they said these guys were taking me to a new school. The "escorts" as they were called threw me into their rented car and I quickly locked all the doors before they could get in. Much to my surprise, these guys had left the keys in the car. I turned the keys and the car started. Although I couldn't see anything, I started to back the car up and turn it around.

Moments later, glass shattered all around me. One of the guys pulled me out of the car and I landed in the broken glass, cutting my legs, arms, and feet. The escorts returned with some of my clothes and dressed me. Little did I know, the nightmare had only begun. After I was handcuffed and taken to the airport, these guys returned their damaged car which someone had "broken in". I yelled for help at the airport, but my cries were ignored.

Physically and emotionally exhausted, I passed out on the airplane and woke up in Idaho of all places. I was driven to the northern part of the panhandle where I arrived at my new "school". Upon arrival, I was ordered to strip down to my boxers which I initially refused. After my clothes were removed, the staff member saw the cuts all over my body. He asked if I cut myself. At that point, I told him that the escorts had pulled me out of a window.

I refused to go with him to the dorm and asked to call my parents. He refused my request and about 4 hours later I was taken to a mental hospital where I stayed for 3 weeks under the "care" of a psychiatrist who oversaw all the "patients" at the "school" I was it. Rumor has it that this guy saw over 400 patients at a time. Some of the people at the hospital were bipolar or had other mental illlnesses. Others, like myself, had merely been uncooperative with the program.

In reality, I got the better of it. The other alternative was a 6 - 8 week bootcamp called Ascent, where students were forced to march through the wilderness, dig holes, and move heavy rocks from place to place all the while staff screamed at them and told them they were worthless. One person at a similar wilderness program was attacked by a bear.

When I finally arrived at the school, my clothes were taken away and as part of the program, I had to purchase wrangler jeans, and plane t-shirts. I had a patagonia fleece and they cut off the logo. I was put into a "peer group" and a "team". I would go through "prophets" with the peer group, one every couple of months. These basically involved telling a bunch of people who were either ex drug addicts, admitted child molesters, or mormons who thought they were doing you a favor all the stuff that was messed up about your life. There were weekly or biweekly "rap" sessions where these students and staff would scream at each other at the top of their lungs.
Most students went along with the program, but I refused to yell as the entire thing seemed insane to me. My privilege of clothes were taken away and I was forced to wear a jumpsuit, similar to what an auto mechanic wears. Kids who lost their clothing privilege were required to wear a jumpsuit even if it was sweltering outside.
The staff at this place was a medley of misfits although there were one or two normal folks who were just kind of out of place. Many of the staff were in their early 20's and were Mormons. One guy had tried to kill himself with a shotgun and had actually confessed to molesting children in the past. Other people were ex drug addicts or dealers. About 50% of the staff there didn't even have a college education and nearly everyone was unqualified to deal with kids, many of whom had serious problems.
Why were my parents cool with this? They didn't have a fucking clue. The staff would read all the mail that I sent out and if they didn't like what I wrote, they wouldn't send the mail. Also, I had no contact with my closest friends from back home. The staff withheld all letters from them. What about talking on the phone? My parents spoke with a "counselor" from the school once a week and spoke with me once every 2 weeks for 10-15 minutes. If I said anything that the staff didn't like, they would hang up the phone and simply tell my parents that I was trying to manipulate them.

I didn't leave the campus for a over a year. It was 7 miles to the nearest town and residents were finanically rewarded if they caught students. As a student, you weren't allowed to have any cash on you, which made it more difficult to escape. I started hiding small change and training in cross country. I read Tom Brown books in case, so I would have some survival skills in case I bailed.

The food we were fed was absolute shit. I have a very distinct memory about eating macaroni and cheese that was covered in flies. In fact, it was so bad that I started my own sustenance garden.

I could probably write a book about how fucked up that school was and it's sad that these places still exist. I left the place when I turned 18 and went to another boarding school for 6 months. Even though that put me a 6 months behind everyone else in my grade, it was worth it since it actually helped prepare me for college and I went to a top 30 school. I rarely talk about the past and few people know the full story


Source:
The original testimony on Reddit

Aftermath of a stay at the Discovery Academy

This testimony was found on Reddit. It covers mostly the aftershock of having been placed in a institutionalized environment. All rights goes to the original author.

I started smoking meth at age 16. I grew up in a decent home, but my ma is crazy (neurotic i think), was emotionally absent as a mother and left when I was 15 for a man she reconnected with thru AOL. I had a hard time fitting into society in Texas and went down the wrong path way too early, having being given independence from my parents, but not much guidance. Everybody says I'm "book smart", but I had no idea what I was getting into as that little girl.

Meth was great for a while, partied on and off. Had awesome crazy sex, got my homework done, room was clean, and I'd tweak out and do artwork. I didn't get caught til I was 17, when I was nearly kicked out of high school for selling Xanax to support my meth habit, but was only caught with a weed pipe.

I was sent to wilderness therapy, which sucked but was cool. Following that time in the woods, i was immediately taken to an institution called "disovery academy", a therapeutic boarding school, aka lockdown for rich kids. The effects of institutionalization have never left me. If jnterested, see Erving goffman's "total institution".

That school was a few states away from my home state, but on my 18th birthday, I left because they couldn't legally hold me for therapy anymore, I would have to check myself in, and I refused, being able to see the program for its exploitative, harmful nature. My father and his new wife (who had encouraged sending me away so there would be no obstacles to her wedding) refused to let me stay with them. My mother wanted to send me to another state to live with her sister. Mind you, before all this, I had just been a high school student with no responsibilities. Now, I'm 18, and I'm gonna have to pay all my bills, find somewhere to live and try and stay sober with no support from my family, who were busy with their new families. So I tried. I went to the other state. It didnt work. I came back to texas and did ok for a few months. I paid rent at my mothers husbands house. I paid my phone and my car insurance and found a good job in literally one week. I started community college eventhough I never technically finished high school, I flew under the radar with great SAT scores.

Well I couldn't hold it together. My family were acting terrible, and I had no life skills for handling responsibility. My stepdad kicked me out, due to his anger/control issues, eventhough i was as straight as possible (only a little beer/weed after work). So i reacted and I made some really bad choices and spent a few months in a terrible period of my life, freshly 18y/o girl spun out in Dallas. The things I have seen and the people I have met are the worst. It kills me to think that people have to grow up in those families. I have lasting damage from being raped several times, starting before the meth use, and during this period the sexual exploitation was the worst. I now live in a state far away from my loving family partially because of this period in my life. There are a few people-- mid level suppliers and gang bangers who I absolutely do not want to run into. Then there are my scummy former cohorts, white trash from my hometown who I let pimp me out to the threat above. I strive to live a beautiful life these days just to spite them. In a few short months of constant meth use I experienced: beatings (the worst my ex smushed my face into a parking lot), three times people tried to steal my car, I was roofied, I was banned from motel 6 because I had a threesome over a pile of dollar store stuff that we dumpster dived and we left the room trashed, I was pimped out at the end of a five day long acid trip to a scary ass dealer and now still fear that they will come after me for not taking a trap they set up, I went thru five phones and two blackberries, had another threesome and ruined my friendship with my best gf, got chlamydia/hpv and possibly herpes, was arrested and jailed for five days and then had to do the whole probation/court dance, I was chased by gang members and had to hitchhike forty plus miles to safety, I was nearly beaten for the accepting the help of a black stranger and really, I came out better than most. After I lost my car and therefore place to live, I begged my mom to let me stay at her stupid husbands house again and got myself into state college ASAP.

College was going great until I transferred to Austin. I never really dealt with my issues eventhough I had quit meth for good. Was stil young enough not to know how to even feed myself nutriously. Got depressed, started partying. Made the huge mistake of doing heroin at a party, cause I'm into uppers right? Got hooked instantly, as you would expect from someone who started smoking meth at 16. Spent a year terribly addicted to heroin, hiding my junkie abusive mooch boyfriend in my tiny college apt with fiveroommates listening to our drug use/domestic violence. Well, I eventually broke up with him, couldn't kick the habit and got a sugar daddy, as I was reading Lolita at school, shudder. Just as I went back and fucked the first boy who raped me (who was a 15 y/o high on meth when he did it, but it was before I started using), I went back and fucked my sugar daddy again when I by chance reconnected with him clear across the country after I got completely sober. Confusingsentence but point is, lasting issues.

To conclude, I haven't used heroin in three+ years or any opiates and it has been a huge struggle. My ex got hep c. I have a thousand dollar ambulance bill because I fainted at work from the blood test I had for hep c. I am neg, but it is karma. Everyday is a challenge not to do drugs, and normal life is always slightly less enthralling, kind of dull. I still yearn for support. I have a normal 8-5 and no one even knows, because I moved several states and I have an "honest face" and dont want to expose my past. I often feel that if it hadn't been for that goddamn meth so young, I wouldn't have such intense opiate cravings. I also still crave meth after having not touched it in 6+ years and knowing it is foul poison. And like I said, I came out relatively unscathed; if it hadn't been for my family coming around eventually and being decent in the first place, I wouldn't have been able to bounce back as easily as I did as many times as I did.

Sources:

• The original testimony (Reddit)
• Factsheet about the school (Fornits Wiki)

Video testimony about Ironwood in Maine

This video testimony was found on Youtube. All rights goes to the original author.



Ironwood was founded in 2006. In the start some former employees from Turnabout Ranch in Utah helped the management to establish the school. They have since developed their own program. The profit seems to finance the owners interests in horse breeding.

In 2014 a former employee was charged with child sex assaults. He fled the state before the investigation was finished and it is not known if the charges had anything to do with his work at the facility

Sources:

• My poetic experience, juvenile camp age 17 (The original testimony on Youtube)
• 181. Ironwood Maine (1000 places You don't want to be as a teenager)
• Ex-police chief accused of child sex assaults worked at Maine teen facility (Portland Press Herald)

Kevin Duffy at Darrington Academy

This testimony was found on Topix.com. All rights goes to the original author known as Kevin Duffy

I went to Darrington Academy. I was at Carolina Springs for 14.5 months, then at DA for another 5 months. The following two paragraphs are concerning Darrington Academy only.

Sexual abuse? Students were once forced to jump up and down wearing only a towel, to ensure they weren't hiding drugs in their bowels. The headmaster himself (if that's the title Richard Darrington went by) lectured me once about masturbation after making the rest of the students leave the room. I'm sure the school kept a tight lid on the incident where an 18 year old boy had sex with a 14 year old girl in the laundry room.

Physical abuse? Literally bursting at the seams. I've seen students thrown against the walls of the shoddy converted trailers we used for activities. I mostly kept out of the way of physical harassment myself by staying quiet, but I was hazed when I first came to Darrington by other "upper level" students. I was forcibly held down and duct-taped to a chair. I responded with the quick and decisive violence one might expect from a 6'3" football player, and was able to remove myself from the chair, though I lost most of the hair on my left arm.

Don't even get me started on the staff (at either facility). The only competent individual I encountered was an outside contractor who provided real psychiatric care to the students at CSA (at additional cost). Any of the other staff could be easily manipulated to serve my needs, provided that I wasn't obvious about it like some of the less intelligent students.

Please feel free to contact me at (Email removed)if you have any questions or comments. Also please not that I do not care to be harassed by program parents. I am aware of all facets of the programs. Maybe sensitivity training is what your child needs; maybe your boy needs someone twice his size to beat him senseless and restrain him using incredibly painful pressure points that don't leave bruises. If you want to talk, I'd be happy to talk, but blind harassment is pointless and will be ignored.

The academy closed some years ago. A police investigation was started looking into claims of abuse at the school


Sources:

• The original testimony (Topix.com)
• Factsheet about the program (Fornits Wiki)

Testimony about Diamond Ranch Academy

This testimony was found as a reply to a blog entry on the blog runned by Secret Prison for Teens. All rights goes to the original author

A lot of comments I have made in the past have ended up helping fuel the rage against DRA and I just want to add to those.

Before I go into further detail I want to state that the focus should not be on the troubled teen industry and especially not specifically one place.

IT should be on the state of UTAH which is proven to be funded by the church of lds and the donations of various Mormon owned companies such as troubled teen industries.

I have seen a kid who unsuccessfully tried committing suicide right in front of me multiple times. I had to live with the poor soul who had probably one of the most troubled past I have yet to come upon and the improper mixture of medicine to follow. I am studying medicine now and I can tell you the combination alone of just half of the psych med he was taking would cause me to turn suicidal.

One instance was when the kid was sitting on the rocks which he was isolated on. In a treatment called Isiah-landing aka Islanding where one is forced to sit in the 105 degree sun and be isolated from the group as punishment for bad behavior.

Please not while this is happening... the rest of the children are eating out of dog bowls filled with 24 oz of sour kraut or if morning a bowl of oatmeal cooked in over 1-2 gallons of sauerkraut juice in lieu of water. Pickle juice in your morning cereal is a good comparison If your not accustomed to fine German food like I am.

Blanket punishment influenced on everyone due to a child... stealing a piece of bread out of the trash can where the insider program doers dump there left over scraps. The trash can represents what resembles the scraps you would put in a pigs trough. I have personally eaten out of the trash can due to days where I would not be able to see straight from the lack of food due to the 13 year old cooking 150 peoples food unsupervised mistakes. opps. back to the witnessed suicide attempt. -_- This child was so suicidal he tried to swallow a golf ball sized rock. The staff happen to catch him doing this obviously because of the gagging and called for help on the restraint.

The restraint that followed was one you would see on the tv show "COPS" after a suspect was tackled for a very serious crime and arrested. 4 giant football players and 1 being one of the biggest guys I have ever met probably weighing 330 pounds. Would have been a defensive line backer for NFL if he didnt get hurt while playing for a college team. Followed with 210 -225 pounds lean. athletes who proceed to restrain this kid who was 120 pounds and 14 years old. He had multiple skin infections from mosqito bites and a scratching which was left untreated for 9 months so the sun was bothering him .... and just couldn't take it and lost control of his will to live. I was ordered multiple times to take care of this child and one of the demands made to me due to his
itching was to tape his hands together. I was told to use almost an entire roll of duct tape to tape his hands together since the previous taping of garden gloves to his wrists still allowed his ability to itch. Going against all that is Mormon and using Darwinism to come to the conclusion that if you have hands which allow you to itch and then remove those hands you lose the ability to itch. So put gloves on the kid tape them to his wrists and then tape his hands together with another roll of tape.

This guy had a hard time controlling his bladder alone so you can imagine sitting in 105 degree sun and being forced to drink 1 gallon of water a day while only being allowed to pee every 2-3 hours after hiking 4-5 miles pulling a ox cart with your hands taped together. For some reason re reading what i just wrote reminded me of Joseph smith.... Why:? Well the root cause is because of all the food I was given when I came to LDS church on sundays at Diamond ranch academy held by our science teacher... The side effect and main reason why it reminds me of J,Smith is because of how in a way there hiking and digging projects resembles how the plates of nephi where found but that is another story.

Back to the restraint.

The staff each restrained one limb of the child for over 15 minutes while his face was directly in the rocks that the child tried eating to end his suffering 15 minutes prior. Two types of rocks there are smooth rocks and there where lava rocks. When ever you got restrained by head staff they love to put your face in the extremely sharp Lava rocks. That is why they call the campus LAVA FALLS and being homeless. When your face is being ravaged by lava rocks it gets cut up pretty bad. I have never seen more then two people restrain a person while at dra except for this child. I weighed 180 at the time and even then I had only been restrained 1 time by two people (and im 2nd or 3rd place for restraints ). The suicide reports on this kid alone are probably numerous And need to be reviewed by the federal court. (I guess Romney proved that the federal system cant be bought so thats why I choose Federal Over State court.) Not that that It would matter anyway because I can personally attest to my personal experience of which I screamed at an inspector, "They made us hide there filthy semen, vomit, urine, etc mattress in the gym." I yelled this 4 times of what I can recall because I only got close enough to yell at these inspectors. They heard me but continued to not confront me. I was punished very hard for this through physical exercise and screaming. I was just getting even since We had to wake up 50 minutes early to take our filthy beds to the gym and where worked extra hard the night before cleaning the over crowded dorms.

This brings me to what I stated before. -Its the game not the players- We need to focus our efforts on the people in charge. Aside from the crooked private licensing organizations ran by the Mormon Mafia- WE need to as people under the federal court to abolish there rights to perform this.

Take what is happening in California for example. If the federal courts can demand the state prisons to release people due to overcrowding for non violent crimes and reposition the majority then why cant the federal courts abolish these types of treatment facilities ...

These are children. Not your typical children who run track or are voted prom king or queen. But maybe if they where not raped/beaten/ignored or simply raised differently then there would be a shining glimmer in each ones eye like the rest of there friends... In comparison to all the people who have complained about DRA or even as far as created little blogs and such have effectively done something. The same can be said about solitary reflection. I learned a lot about myself from the confinement but it only helped me learn how to deal with a problem and not SOLVE the problem.

*If my statements are used and I find out d.r.a tries to repute them I will be forced to drop time dates and names. To D.R.A. You know who I am. The suicide that has happen here would of happen a long time ago if you didn't restrain the suicidal. I have personally seen you fracture J.M's arm (who was autistic due to his birthing mothers drug addiction. ) He could not help himself. Unable to kill himself due to his learning disability he would cry constantly "Why dont you just -friggen- kill me already" While being restrained almost weekly.

Your use of punishment by physical force is excessive. Your use of punishment by calisthenic exercise exceeds that of the military. Its sole purpose is to exert so much physical exhaustion that one cant move to lift there arms let alone tie a rope. Yet the while of one person was stronger then your punishment. You took this persons happiness and joy away. You left them for the 18 year old staff that you hire out of dixie state college to perform pscyho-analisis reports and to mimic a employee who works at a mental institution. Your staff is grossly undereducated on both the real world and what it takes to properly analyze a mentally disturbed person.

I have had a short physical relationship with your female staff outside of the ranch and have gotten to really know who you are having run your facilities. Drug addicts treating drug addicts seems to have worked for N.A. groups but not when there punishing the people there treating through pain.

Diamond Ranch Academy was founded in 1999 in Idaho. The authorities intervened in their operations forcing them to move to Utah where the authorities short to say don't care much about what goes on at such places. They used to be located east of Hurricane but moved to a new campus west of Hurricane not long ago. A boy died there some years ago on the old campus. Another boy committed suicide on the new campus in 2013.


Sources:

• Diamond Ranch Academy fights back at negative testimonies from former students. (The original testimony found on the Secret Prisons for teen blog)
• Factsheet about the program (Fornits Wiki)

Book: Dead, Insane or in Jail: A CEDU Memoir

This book by Zack Bonnie tells the story about how to be forced to attend a CEDU bording school.

All the CEDU schools closed around 2005 after a number of lawsuits were issued by parents and former students.

Also several students disappeared never to be found again. Some of the children were most likely murdered by a serial killer James Lee Crummel who had unrestricted accesss to one of the campuses. To this day there are families out there looking for their relatives.

CEDU was founded in 1967 by an owner of a furniture business, who after a brief stint at Synanon created the first school in California where the main tool for transforming the children into the products their parents ordered were attack therapy.

The founder died in 2002. The school were sold but closed only some few years later due to the lawsuits.

The book provides a good insight into how it was to be a student in these special schools. After the original schools closed the concept were transferred into other schools where some are open even today.

Sources:

• Website about the book
• Article on Goodreads

Student testimony about the John Dewey Academy

The John Dewey Academy is located in Great Barrington, Massachusetts, housed in Searles Castle. In the media it is mostly known for a student-teacher relationship 10 years ago. All rights to this testimony goes to the original author who has decided to remain unnamed.

I went to JDA and it was the worst experience in my entire life. I ran away half a year ago. I was virtually homeless for four months because my parents were advised by the JDA staff not to let me come home.

The therapy session quoted in this article was mild compared to JDA standards. Therapy was usually much, much worse. It wasn't uncommon to be called "a fucking worthless piece of shit" "a manipulative, dishonest bastard" etc. It was verbal abuse.

After I left I received a letter from Bratter telling me, among other things, that I was friendless, that I'd never had any real friends in my entire life and I never would learn how to make friends. He wrote that the only way I would survive outside of John Dewey was if I resorted to prostitution and the only way I could become a "worthwhile" person was if I came back and completed the program. He wrote that he feared all I would ever become, at best, was "the assistant to the assistant to the assistant manager at a fast food restaurant."

When I first came to the program I was a senior. I'd already applied to several highly selective colleges. Tom Bratter asked me where I wanted to go and I told him my first choice and he told me if I stayed, he would get me in because another student who was graduating that year had applied early and been deferred, but with his insider info and leverage he was confident he could threaten the school into accepting the student. While I was at JDA this particular student was accepted into the school and is now attending it thanks to Bratter.

In his letter he also mentioned acceptance to the school, that if I came back I still had a chance of going there but if I left I'd never get in. I refused to go back, determined to never, ever return to a place where I'd felt so horribly worthless, which was quite a feat for someone who has been severely depressed for almost half her life.

I wasn't like most of the kids sent to JDA. I had never done any drugs, even pot, in my life, I never drank, I'd never engaged in promiscuous behavior, I'd been a straight-A student. I'd never cheated, stolen, or hurt other people. I was just severely depressed, and had attempted suicide several times even after years of therapy. My parents were fed up and didn't want to deal with me anymore, and John Dewey provided a great solution.

It was the worst thing they could have done.

The first time I tried to leave, I announced that I was because of their "open-door" policy. Bratter told me I was welcome to leave, but a student told me he'd call the cops the minute I set foot outside the door.

One day a while after that incident, I just walked out the door and across the street to the general store that sold bus tickets while most students were in classes. I hid in the bushes of the station until the bus arrive and boarded. I had all of $8.34 when I arrived in New York City, where I'd lived, and no phone numbers or means of contacting anyone because when I'd arrived at John Dewey they had taken all of that personal information away.

At John Dewey I suffered verbal abuse and isolation. I had to scrub the toilets my second week there because I'd asked a "Younger Member" a question without a Middle or Older Member listening. I worked through Closed House, which was a school-wide "consequence" where, among other things, we weren't allowed to eat cooked food, or sit down at all during the day, except for designated therapy time. The only place we were allowed to sit during the day was the floor, and only if it was hardwood or marble, no carpet. If we leaned back on our hands we were punished. We were never allowed more than six hours of sleep. All our "privileges" were taken away. We weren't allowed to go outside at all. We couldn't groom ourselves. During the day we had to "Super-GI" the entire castle, which included scrubbing the group in between the tiles on our hands and knees with q-tips. We could have no cooked food, prepared meals, or sweet foods. We could only drink water.

Closed House lasted almost an entire month.

I still have nightmares of John Dewey and it's affected me more than my parents care to understand. They still think they were right in sending me there, but I can't disagree more.


These places are not the answer.



Sources:

• The original testimony (Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora )
• Angel Teachers: Educators Who Care about Troubled Teens (by William L. Fibkins, R&L Education,)
• Factsheet about the school (Fornits Wiki)

Stu C.about his daughters stay at Uinta Academy

This testimony was found on Yelp made by a father to one of girls, the facility had in their custody. All rights goes to the original author.

This place is not only a prison for the girls attending there, but more disturbingly believes they have the legal right to keep one parent from talking with their child at all, let alone visiting them. Oh they will try to point to confusing court documents submitted by the other parent, but when in doubt, or even when no doubt, their policy is the PAYING parent, the admitting parent controls ALL contact the young adult is allowed. So in cases of divorce that means if the mother admitted their daughter not only can the mother prevent the father from ANY contact with her, but also her paternal grand parents, aunts, uncles, etc... as well as the young lady's best friends. That means not only phone calls & visits, but also letters, cards and gifts! Impossible in America! you say! It has happened to my daughter. 100% contact from any past friends or paternal relatives blocked not by court orders, but by Uinta Academy personnel simply because mother wanted it that way. And it's been that way for over ONE YEAR now. Sadly, that's despite our daughter's attempt to reach out to her father & father's family over a year ago, so this is 100% about the paying parent's will, not the child's desire or needs. And if the young lady speaks up about her desires, her needs, her wants of ANY kind that doesn't fit within the institution's definition of healthy requests, they control all privileges, this is brain washing, mind control, behavioral reprogramming of the most insidious kind. If I had had the $'s we would have taken these abuses all the way to the Supreme Court if need be... it's only a matter of time before someone does. Thank God! Girls imprisoned in such an environment become hopeless and therefore the police record of reports for this "prison" reveals multiple suicide attempts and girls that run away. Don't take my word for how manipulative and controlling the absolute power is that this prison exercises over their "patients", the young ladies that went there say it better than I ever could,

"...i was sent to Uinta for 10 months for depression basically, and from first hand experience, i know the program worked for some girls, but i hated it and did exactly what i had to do to get out of there. i never really got in trouble because i just wanted to go home, but because of that i have had to totally compromise who i am, i lost all my creativity, fire, passion, and leadership spirit, i am now to shy and quiet and scared to even just go out and hang out wth friends, being forced to do everything we had to their made me less of a person and i will never forget that. please never send your kids here, they might benefit but i've seen heard and experienced my self and others horrible stories of how they will never be the same. i still have nightmares every night that girls from uinta are constantly in, and its horrifyingly haunting...".

"...i attended this place for 1 year and it sounds beautiful, it looks beautiful, but to be on the inside is a whole different world, the staff were mean and cruel and broke me down till i felt like a shell of a person, for the sake of your child please dont send them here, i would of been much happier in a rehab or honestly, jail!"

"...i went there. its awful. i tried to kill myself because it was so awful. been to 12 treatment centers. it was the worst. jeff simpson is a con artist. i ran away 2 times. the staff are mean and rude. people there do not care about the girls. just the money..."



Sources:

• The original testimony found on Yelp.com
• Factsheet about the program (Fornits Wiki)

Testimony from Mountain Park Academy in Missouri

We just learned that one of the men who were convicted of killing William Andrew Futrelle II in 1996 has died in prison. In cases where students have tried or succeeded in killing another student just to end up in prison instead people are often asking: Why? How can it be so gruesome to be at a boarding school that the only option seems to take another persons life? Mountain Park was no especially bad. It was just a normal religious boarding school as they still exist today. So it is just a matter of time before the next tragedy happens. Two men ended up in prison as result of the murder and one family never got their son back.

Should it not be the time where Missouri intervenes and demands oversight over religious boarding school so students are not restricted to their campus but can get weekend off from day one to spend in the community? Of course. We are speaking 2015. The murder happended decades ago and nothing has happen. Here is a testimony from a girl who attended the boarding school at the same time of the murder:

I don't remember much, having blocked a lot out and from the effects of the thorazine, but here's what i do remember:

I left for Mountain Park on August 25, 1995. My parents and I were driving from Florida, and it took us 2 days to get there. I knew that I was going to a boarding school, and I even knew that it was a "Christian" school. I had no problems with that, I was raised a Catholic (sort of) and I thought that God was alright. I was 13 when my parents decided to send me there. I wasn't an awful kid, but I was back talking, I failed science (a big deal for a 7th grader), and I was getting into shoplifting from the local stores. My best friend at the time, who I considered much wiser than I, had gone to a European boarding school, and typical of 7th grade, I wanted to out do her. So of course, when my parents broached the subject of a boarding school for me, I jumped at it. What did I know?? Anyways, we left home and made the trip to the Ozarks.

On August 28, 1995, we drove up to the school that would become my hell. I remember that I was wearing a black skirt, a wildly printed black silk shirt, and black heels. I remember thinking, "This won't be so bad. These people seem nice." When my parents came down to say goodbye, I hugged and kissed them, not knowing it would be the last time I would see them for four months.

No one was out right mean to me the first few days, and I think that was because I was too scared to hardly talk to anyone. I do remember after the first shower I took there I wanted to "scrunch" my hair, because it's naturally curly, and I was told that I wasn't allowed to do that. I thought it was strange, but I agreed.

I cried a lot my first couple of days, and in one of the first letters I wrote home, I said that the water spot on the page was real tears (it was) and I was crying them because I hated my parents for leaving me there. That was when I got labeled as a troublemaker and a crybaby. From that day on, everything changed. I was not longer the "girl they would have no trouble with". I became the child from hell that needed to be taught a lesson. If I was ever seen in public crying, I was ridiculed. If I ever wrote a letter home asking why I was there, I was ridiculed.

I remember the incident that cemented my humiliation and degradation. Before I left home for MP, I had my hair cut and I had bought a shampoo that doubled as a body wash. (I still remember that it smelled like bubble gum.) I got out of the shower one day after using it as both and the shower monitor noticed that the bag with my bar of soap in it was still dry. My OG looked as if she wanted to die because she had a "dirty" new student. I was taken to Mama's office where I tried to explain that I could use it as both, but they just laughed me off. I even tried to show them the bottle, but they would have none of it. Debbie said that if I wasn't going to wash myself that she would wash me. I told her that I did wash and she said I was lying, and I got my first swats. Ten, to be exact. Then to top it off, she took me to the showers in First Dorm and made me get back in where she proceeded to watch me as I showered again. She also said that I had bruises on me from the paddle and that was a good thing because maybe whenever I sat down I would remember that I would get punished for lying. Needless to say, they decided that I was not to be trusted anymore. That is also when I got the famed "soap-box necklace" and the baby chair. They told me that if I couldn't bathe like an adult, I needed to be reminded by the soap boxes around my neck and that I needed to sit on a chair to remind myself that I was a baby who couldn't wash. Talk about humiliation. I was forced to wear and carry those things for at least a month. I can't remember how many times I stood up in church and said that I got "saved" or that I "rededicated" my life to God. One night Sam even said to me, "Are you sure this is for real? Are you ready to get rid of the soap-boxes?" Even now, I cringe.

On the coveted day that I gained my "freedom" as a single girl, I swore to myself that I would stay out of trouble. I don't remember what I did to get in trouble again, but once again, I found myself in trouble. This time, though, they told me I had to write the word hateful 5000 times. I thought that then, I would be home free. Little did I know that my life, as I knew it even at MP, was about to change.

From that time on, no matter what I did, I got in trouble. I was on silence, I had a baby chair, you name it, they did it. I was on "silence" for months, not allowed to talk to anyone but staff.

I remember when Will Futrelle was killed. (For those who don't know, Will was part of a group that planned to take over the school. He changed his mind and the other boys didn't want him to tell, so they murdered him.) It hit home for me because I was from Boca Raton too. I didn't know him, but some of the other Florida girls did. I felt bad for them.

When Child Protective Services (CPS) came to the school to interview us, I was so nervous that I nearly forgot my name because I didn't want to say anything negative towards the school and get into more trouble than ususal. The second time they came, which was about 3 or 4 months later, I had my first interview with them and then I was called back for a second interview because one of the other girls (I know now she was trying to look our for me) had said that I was treated badly. I was so scared that they were going to take me out of the school that I just cried and begged to be let go. When they dismissed me I went crying back to the dorm where I was promptly told to quit crying because no one wanted to take me away. I wasn't important enough.

When my mother finally realized all that was going on, and to the extent that it was, she told the school that she was coming to get me. At the time, I had a perpetual writing assignment from Mama. I was to write 200 lines a day, for 7 consecutive days. If I missed a day, I had to start all over. This had been going on for probably 2 months, and I had been told I was not allowed to exercise with the others, or go swimming. I went from 136 lbs. up to 150 lbs. in 2 months. The day my mother took me out of that hell-hole would have been my 7th day of writing lines. Ironic, isn't it? I also was not told until she was an hour away that I was going home. I panicked. I didn't think I was ready to go home!! On August 18, 1997, my mother rescued me from the hell that was, and is, MP.

When I first got home, I had to go to public school, because my parents were broke from MP and couldn't afford my church's school (HCA). What a culture shock. It was there that I learned about all I had missed in the last 2 years. I learned about OJ, the internet, Princess Di, and a multitude of other things, from an 11 year old, the only person I felt I could relate to. I was 15, and I was being taught by an 11 year old. By the end of my sophomore year, I was back in my shorts, my jeans, and trying to figure out who I was away from MP. Because I was bitter about MP, and because I had never really changed, I went right back to my "old" self. I transferred to HCA my junior year, and things started looking up. I made some friends and started to come around. However, I could not believe that I was not worthless and insignificant, as all at MP had told me.

Since I have left there, I have been diagnosed as bi-polar. This diagnosis only came after attempting suicide. With the help of some very good friends, I once again started the climb back up the self-esteem ladder. It has not been easy, and many of these memories I would have liked to have forgotten completely, but for the sake of other girls going through what I went through, I must tell my story. Now I am married, with a wonderful husband who loves and supports me, a beautiful baby boy, and a wonderful relationship with my mom which has become my lifeline. I am on meds now, to help balance my moods and control the depression. It helps, but it's still hard. For a long time, I blocked MP. I didn't want to remember the hell. Now, as the can of worms is opened around them, I realize that the person I was before, as far as my self confidence went; well, that person will return some day. For the rest of me, that's gone. I can't get my innocence back. I can't erase the permanent marks made both on my body and on my soul from this hell, but I can sure try to stop them from hurting someone else. I'm sorry if this is long-winded, but I wrote what I felt I needed to be said. My love and prayers go to all the other survivors out there. Let's stick together to end the hell we all lived.

Rebecca XXXX
student from 95-97

After the closure of this boarding school in 2004, the employees took jobs in similar schools all over Missouri working just the same as they did at Mountain Park.

Sources:

• stories from a "gulag" school (The original testimony on a message board)
• Man convicted as a teen of murder at Missouri boarding school dies (The Missouri Net)
• Factsheet about the school (Fornits Wiki)

A sister about her siblings stay at Project PATCH

This testimony was found in a comment to an article in the magezine Craked. All rights goes the original author.

I know the name of the facility/cult. They go by Project PATCH. I know this because my sister suffered the abuse at that very facility. It is run by a Seventh Day Adventist group, and among the ranks are child abusers, including one man who was convicted of kidnapping and raping a kid there (one my sis made friends with at the time). His name was Ryan something, it's Google-able.

They stripped her of her clothing and gave her a sheet when she tried to run away. They made her work until her hands bled. She was chastised for weeping. The leader frequently had little girls sit on his lap and stared down the chests of the young teenage girls. Luckily, my mother figured out something was very wrong and pulled her out, but they fought. They fought to silence her, too. She has full blown PTSD and cries frequently. She thinks about it daily. The other torture victims she befriended included five girls, all of whom ended up in some form of prostitution and addicted to drugs.

My sister dissolved into tears reading this. I confess that I cried, too, but I also had some happy tears in there, because it's confirmation that we weren't crazy. My mother sometimes cries herself to sleep over the guilt of trying to do the right thing, and instead having inadvertently caused the daughter she loves so much so much pain and anguish. We've all been through therapy. And despite having a convicted child kidnapper and rapist on board, and being sued for everything they are worth, they still operate. It brings me to tears from time to time. The pain is so visible in my sibling's eyes. It kills me.

TL;DR---The place in the story is called Project PATCH, and my sister was a prisoner there for some months. Every allegation is true, if not somehow played down. A staff member raped a kid there and yet the place still stands.


Sources:

• The article with the comment
• Factsheet of the program (Fornits Wiki)
• Any info on Project PATCH or Cove Creek? (Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora )

Sarah at New Beginnings Girls Academy

This Interview was found on the STOP NBGA website. All rights goes to the original author.

1. What is your name? (Only give what you’re comfortable giving, i.e. Full name, first name, initials, first initial and last name. If you choose to use your full name, please include maiden name in addition to your current, legal name.)
   Sarah <name to be found in source>
2. Time spent (give dates to best of your ability) in The Home:
   May 15, 2004 -July 3, 2005
3. Which location?
   Pace, FL
4. What was The Home called when you were there/what name was the institution going by during the time of your stay? (i.e. Rebekah Home for Girls, New Beginnings Rebekah Academy, New Beginnings Girls Academy, New Beginnings Ministries. Multiple answers may be necessary.)
   New Beginnings Girls Academy
5. Who were the head directors at the time?
   Bill "Brother Mac" McNamara and Jennifer "Mrs. Mac" McNamara
6. How old were you?
   I was 17 when I got there, 18 when I left.
7. Please describe reasons/circumstances for which you were sent to The Home: (i.e. trouble with the law, issues at home or school, etc.)
   I had quit going to school about 4 months prior to being sent there and was hanging out with a rough crowd. I was supposed to be doing this homeschool program that my mom got me enrolled in but I never did it. I was gone all the time with my friends and had started to experiment with drugs and alcohol and didn’t really care about where my life was going. There was one incident where I got in trouble with the law and I think that pretty much was the breaking point for my mom. She knew that I needed help and that she couldn’t give it to me because I would not listen to her anymore. So she decided to send me to New Beginnings to finish high school and get my life straightened out.
8. Please describe instances of abuse you EXPERIENCED at The Home, if any:
   
   I personally was never physically abused while there. There was mental abuse that went on all the time. Scare tactics were used, and we were yelled at all the time and called “whores” and various other names. If they thought that we weren’t "right with God" then they would put us on Discipline (a major punishment) for no reason other than that. We had to be happy all the time and feel like we were being helped by them, if we weren’t then we would be "openly rebuked," called names, and denied privileges.
9. Please describe instances of abuse you WITNESSED at The Home, if any.
   
   
   There was a little girl with serious mental health problems. She was about 12 when she came in and was on a bunch of medication for her problems that she truly needed. They took her off all meds and said they could help her better than the medicine. She always looked like she didn’t know what was going on and she didn’t understand why they were treating her the way they did. I remember one time where myself and other girls and staff members were made to stay up with her until about 4 in the morning and force her to stand in a circle of masking tape on the floor. If she got out of the circle or didn’t comply then we had to push her back in. If she kept misbehaving then we had to put her into an ice cold shower with all her clothes on while she screamed. She was always in trouble and yelled at for no reason at all. You could tell that there was something wrong with her and that was not the place she needed to be. She couldn’t even talk that well and we could barely ever understand what she was saying sometimes. They pretty much just treated her like crap and blamed her for it because she wasn’t “right with God" according to them. It was awful and I felt very bad for her.
   There were two girls that I graduated with who were forced to get a tan before graduation. They were told that they were too “white” and that was a sin because being white was something that “gothic” people did. They wanted to talk to their parents about it but the directors would not let them tell them. They were made to stay outside during practically the whole time we were in school for, I'd guess, 6 hours a day with tanning oil all over them while we could see them out the window. I remember looking out there and feeling bad for them because they did not want to get a tan but they had no choice. They tanned until they were burnt and their knees were purple and they had huge blisters. The tanning did not stop until a few days before graduation.
   I remember one incident where we were at church and we stayed there after the service was over and Brother Mac had all the girls stand up one by one and the rest of the girls got to raise their hands and vote if that person was “negative” or “positive." The people who were “negative” got punished. They gave them 4 sheets of toilet paper when they used the bathroom, took away all condiments from their food, and had to drink only water with meals and made them stand at their bunk beds with their nose touching the bar at the end every night until 11pm, (an hour and a half to two hours after Lights Out,) and they also took away all extra privileges. They were told that they weren’t right with God and rebuked often. The people who were considered “positive” got nothing. We just had to watch the “negative” people suffer. It was messed up.
   If someone tried to run away or just couldn’t take it anymore and didn’t obey their rules, the directors would have other girls in the home sit on them or hold them down. They would be locked in the dorm for days, even weeks, and had to be constantly watched by the more "trusted" girls They pretty much did whatever it took to restrain them. Some of them just got fed up and refused to do anything because they were tired of being treated like crap and after so long they got to go home or got sent to other homes.
   In the dorm, we were always rushed to be ready on time, trying to make our way through 20 other girls to get ready. It was stressful. We had to iron our clothes and they could not have any wrinkles in them or we would get in trouble. We were timed when we ironed and that resulted in us rushing to get it done and trying not to have any wrinkles and we would burn ourselves often. If we burned ourselves a lot, we would get in trouble for that also (they'd say we were hurting ourselves on purpose) and they would take away our curling irons/flat irons, and someone else would have to iron for us and that would result in them being late and getting in trouble. There was always something to get in trouble for. It would be the stupidest thing like looking around in line or just talking or something stupid like that. It was hard not to get in trouble. It was horrible and everyone was always scared, even some of the staff.
10. Do you feel that you witnessed or experienced any discrimination for race, faith, or any other characteristic or persuasion? If so, please explain.
    
    I remember people being insulted for their sexuality. If they were gay they were called "faggots" and told they were going to hell.
11. What was your overall impression of The Home? Do you believe that it helped you?
    
    My overall impression of the home is that it was a mentally and physically abusive facility. It was a complete waste of time and money. It put me in a place where I really was not happy (but had to pretend to be) and I tried to do everything that they wanted me to so I could hurry up and get out of there. The rules were crazy and extreme and nothing the average person would think is right. Nobody deserves to be treated like that and almost all of us would have been happier in jail. At least we could have thought for ourselves and kept our own beliefs. We weren’t even allowed to talk. When someone just nit picks and looks at every single fault someone has then there is going to be problems. No one is perfect and that is definitely what they expect you to be, which is humanly impossible. I do not believe that it helped me at all. If anything it made me worse than before I was sent there. I now suffer from panic disorder and generalized anxiety disorder, and many others girls that went there also suffer from various kinds of disorders as well.
12. What is your opinion of the quality of education you received while in The Home?
    
    I would say that the education we received while in the home was very poor. It was the A.C.E. (Accelerated Christian Education) curriculum and you had to do these workbooks called PACEs and teach yourself. There were no real or qualified teachers and no really one cared if you learned anything or not. Some of the girls (including myself) and some who weren’t doing well in school would be called outside to work all day during school hours and never really made up any work for the time they missed.
13. How old are you now?
    
    24
14. What was it like being released into the “real world” after your time in The Home?
    
    It was pretty awkward. None of my friends recognized me because I had lost 60 pounds while in there. It was strange to be “normal” again and it took a while to get used to it.
15. What is your current profession?
    I am a stay-at-home mom.
16. What affect did The Home have on your faith, if any?
    
    It really didn’t change what I believed (even though you had to believe exactly what they believed while in there to get by) but it definitely made me sick of being yelled at all the time about things that don’t make sense, always being made to feel like you are “wrong” and a bad person, and need to "get right."

The facility was founded on methods used in the so-called Roloff homes established in Texas in 1970s. The authorities’ interest in the horrible conditions at these homes forced the operations out of state and in the end former employees established their own extreme religious boarding schools. New Beginning and whatever changing name they put behind it to make the authorities lose track of them when they move across state-lines was founded by former Roloff employees.

Sources:

• The original testimony on StopNBGA
• Factsheet about the facility (Fornits Wiki)

Video testimony about Academy at Ivy Ridge - Volume IV

Academy at Ivy Ridge was founded in 2001. They used the curriculum invented by the WWASP organization. In 2005 they were forced to restructure because their high school diplomas was issued on a basis of a poor education quality. Melees among the students didn't improve anything. In 2009 they closed down without having contributed anything positive for the students who were forced to attend the school.

A former student visited deserted campus the former school. The building have been left empty for many years as its reputation in the local community has left it hard to sell. The suicide rate among former students who have passed through the WWASP curriculum is alarming high and rumors speak of the campuses widespread out over several states and countries as haunted places housing the lost souls of the teenagers abandoned by their families at the schools.

The student made a number of video testimonies. Two can be seen below and other will be published in future blog-entries. First video in this blog entry here:



and second video in this blog entry below:



All rights to the videos go to the original author known as j0nas420


Sources:

• See In the Matter of the Academy at Ivy Ridge, Assurance of Discontinuance Pursuant to Executive Law Section 63, Subdivision 15 (Attorney General of the State of New York)
• School For Troubled Youth To Issue Tuition Refunds (Office of the Attorney General)
• Melee Keeps Spotlight on Hard Life at Academy (New York Times)
• Director: Ivy Ridge to close until fall (Watertown Daily News)

Various testimonies about Stockton Boys Ranch in Missouri

These testimonies were made on Yelp.com. All rights goes to the original authors

Gabriel C.'s experience

Worst 14 months of my life here. I was physically and mentally abused. Please email me for my story or more info. If you don't want to take my word for it, I can give you plenty of other references that will tell you the same thing. Please DO NOT send your son here.

gabey_chow@yahoo.com


wisdom l.'s experience

This place is a hell-hole located in a shit-hole of a state. Avoid at all costs. Honestly, if you want your kid and the family to have a better relationship try FAMILY THERAPY. Not send your kid off to a completely different state, not be able to have a first visit until 3 MONTHS LATER, and have other visits every other 3 months. I spent 30 min in the morning reading the KJV Bible and another 30 before sleeping. I also went to CHURCH EVERY DAY...twice on Wednesdays and Sundays. SOOO boring, I pretty much fall asleep every time because of how stupid and illogical the place was.

Oh yeah all this place does is hire staff that belittle the students all day, and is run by a ego-maniac by the name of Bryan Clemenson. These people are stuck in the past and refuse to understand that civilization is moving forward as a whole and don't need backwards ideas from the stone age.


Brett W. Harper's experience

Child abuse, child labor, scare tactics, cover ups, staff being expelled for using horse tranquilizers, other things I will not mention. This school has been shut down in Washington and California for child abuse and failure to adhere to state laws and has only been successful in Missouri where they stay far away from most people who could potentially report their failure to adhere to child abuse and labor laws and state regulations, and where the laws on child abuse are nice and lax.


I spent 4 horrible years here! I was subject to military style PT's or "Physical Training" by X Marines and Army staff when I was just 14 years old. I have PTSD, spinal problems, and all because of this school and I have doctors that will back that up! I would sue but that is spiteful. Besides I care not about gaining anything from them or hurting them. Just take it from an ex student or talk to any other students that have left there (NOT THE ONES THERE BECAUSE THEY MAKE SURE YOU DON'T SAY ANYTHING BAD ABOUT THE SCHOOL BY CENSORING YOUR LETTERS AND PHONE CALLS AND LISTENING TO YOU EVERYWHERE!)

Before I got to this school I didn't know what drugs were, but after talking with students there I did. This school is a TERRIBLE idea for any parent feeling they need help bringing their son closer to them or God.

Want proof? Here ya go... "Be sure your sins will find you out." Facts don't lie; this many people don't just "make stuff up":

• http://sharperiron.org/forum/thread-should-niu-separate-from-bju
• http://www.nospank.net/n-l88r.htm
• http://agapeboardingschooltruth.blogspot.com
• http://www.teenliberty.org/mtnpark.htm

If you feel your intentions are good you really need to work on your methods. Your success rate is TERRIBLE! Over half of my graduating class is dead or in jail. Some success you have there right? You have a lap pool, nice cars, your staff have half a million dollar homes yet you ask for donations "for the kids" and charge as much as you do? Your no better than the televangelists who only want people's money and use religion as a way to get that money!

I challenge you all to think about what I have said, read through the material linked, take your time, do your research, and make an informed decision before sending your son or daughter here. Thanks!

Sincerely,

Brett W. Harper




Sources:

• The original testimonies (Yelp.com)
• Stockton Boys Ranch (A thread on the Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora)

Video testimony about Academy at Ivy Ridge - Volume III

Academy at Ivy Ridge was founded in 2001. They used the curriculum invented by the WWASP organization. In 2005 they were forced to restructure because their high school diplomas was issued on a basis of a poor education quality. Melees among the students didn't improve anything. In 2009 they closed down without having contributed anything positive for the students who were forced to attend the school.

A former student visited deserted campus the former school. The building have been left empty for many years as its reputation in the local community has left it hard to sell. The suicide rate among former students who have passed through the WWASP curriculum is alarming high and rumors speak of the campuses widespread out over several states and countries as haunted places housing the lost souls of the teenagers abandoned by their families at the schools.

The student made a number of video testimonies. Two can be seen below and other will be published in future blog-entries. The first part:



and the second part:



All rights to the videos go to the original author known as j0nas420

Sources:

• See In the Matter of the Academy at Ivy Ridge, Assurance of Discontinuance Pursuant to Executive Law Section 63, Subdivision 15 (Attorney General of the State of New York)
• School For Troubled Youth To Issue Tuition Refunds (Office of the Attorney General)
• Melee Keeps Spotlight on Hard Life at Academy (New York Times)
• Director: Ivy Ridge to close until fall (Watertown Daily News)

JaneDoe'nt at an unknown therapeutic boarding school

Don’t be fooled. NATSAP is not a regulatory agency, and they do NOT investigate any of these facilities.

When a program wants to operate with NATSAP endorsement all they have to do is pay a fee and sign a piece of paper stating that they intend to follow NATSAP “protocol” – they are NEVER inspected nor does NATSAP have any means of checking to see if they actually operate according to the “rules.” NATSAP is also DRASTICALLY underestimating its numbers – these look more like the number of students in WILDERNESS-BASED programs (only a fraction of the total), but there are more like 100,000 kids in these facilities across the US. For an accurate and flawlessly researched account of these programs please refer to Maia Szalavitz’s book “Help At Any Cost: How the Troubled Teen Industry Hurts Kids and Cons Parents.”

As for how these kids – KIDS, remember, NOT criminals – all need “tough love,” consider my story and see what you think. I was NEVER in trouble with the law, I NEVER tried drugs or drank alcohol, and I was never even made to repeat a grade in school, and yet I was enrolled in one of these programs after my parents became convinced by their admissions staff that my talking back and general “attitude” meant that I was going to die. Literally, die. That is the kind of language these places use. And believe me, my parents are well educated individuals who don’t usually take wooden nickels.

Yes, I was an enormous pain in the ass and I had some academic troubles - I admit that. That said, once enrolled, I was subjected to the following (and my program was less harsh than many I have heard about and seen since leaving):

• I was duct taped, from ankles to chin, into a wool blanket and left in an over-air-conditioned 5’x5’ closet for almost 72 hours with nothing to eat but “food sanction rations” (dry tuna on an English muffin half and 6 oz of water, 3x per day – approximately 550 calories) as punishment for nonviolent infractions – I was not taken out for bathroom breaks but rather made to sit in my own excrement for that whole time;
• I was pulled out of school (I was an A+ student) for months at a time and made to carry huge buckets of rocks up and down an extremely steep hill for 12 hours a day on food sanction rations;
• I was made to dig my own 5’x6’x3’ grave with a hand spade, in January, with a denim jacket and no gloves – it took me more than a day because I was weak with hunger and the ground was frozen;
• I was publicly humiliated on a daily basis, including being told (in front of no fewer than 30 people) that I was “a blowup doll to be used for sex by men and then thrown in the trash when they found something better;”
• I watched girls made to relive rapes in order to find the moment when they “asked for it to happen with their behavior;”
• I was physically attacked by a staff member and shaken so violently that several years later I was told by former housemates that they still felt fear when they remembered it;
• I was made to sit either in a stress position or in an isolation room for almost a week because I “rejected the word of Jesus Christ during morning chapel service” (my family is Jewish, which they were well aware of, and I was never told HOW exactly I had erred);
• I was punished for telling a staff member that I loved my gay sister; I was punished by staff for expressing a belief in human evolution; I was made to eat meals off the dirty floor because I was “acting like an animal;” I was strip searched every time I entered the facility after a visit to the doctor or with my family;
• I was made to shower and use the bathroom while being watched for nearly two years – every single time I used the bathroom someone was standing less than 3 feet from me and staring at me; I was kept from seeing or speaking with my family any time I was treated abusively, and my family was told it was because I was “misbehaving and had lost my phone privileges;”
• I was refused medical treatment on several occasions, one of which led to permanent hearing loss in my left ear because they thought I was making up my ear infection “to get attention;” a student killed himself by jumping off a balcony a few months after I left; once a month or so someone would be absent from breakfast because he or she had drank cleaning fluid or tried to slit their wrists in the middle of the night;
• I was tackled and then body slammed by a 300lb male staffer for mopping a floor incorrectly and on another occasion for talking back; and worst, I WAS MADE TO DO ALL OF THESE THINGS TO OTHERS IN ORDER TO “MAKE PROGRESS.”

I am in my 30’s and I am JUST pulling my life back together. It took me years just to adjust to the “real world” outside of that compound in the middle of nowhere. And I am the EXCEPTION, NOT THE RULE. The majority of people who were there with me are going nowhere with their lives, because they don’t know how to live in the world anymore. And NATSAP? It helps give these places a thin veneer of respectability and accountability. They are a business, not a regulatory agency, and they make millions doing what they do. Do your homework, and spread the word - I've waited over a decade for someone to care about what was done (and is still being done) to us.

Source:
Original testimony to be found as a comment to this NBC News article

Video testimony about Academy at Ivy Ridge - Volume II

Academy at Ivy Ridge was founded in 2001. They used the curriculum invented by the WWASP organization. In 2005 they were forced to restructure because their high school diplomas was issued on a basis of a poor education quality. Melees among the students didn't improve anything. In 2009 they closed down without having contributed anything positive for the students who were forced to attend the school.

A former student visited deserted campus the former school. The building have been left empty for many years as its reputation in the local community has left it hard to sell. The suicide rate among former students who have passed through the WWASP curriculum is alarming high and rumors speak of the campuses widespread out over several states and countries as haunted places housing the lost souls of the teenagers abandoned by their families at the schools.

The student made a number of video testimonies. Two can be seen below and other will be published in future blog-entries. First video in this blog entry here:



and the second video in this blog entry here:



All rights to the videos go to the original author known as j0nas420

Sources:

• See In the Matter of the Academy at Ivy Ridge, Assurance of Discontinuance Pursuant to Executive Law Section 63, Subdivision 15 (Attorney General of the State of New York)
• School For Troubled Youth To Issue Tuition Refunds (Office of the Attorney General)
• Melee Keeps Spotlight on Hard Life at Academy (New York Times)
• Director: Ivy Ridge to close until fall (Watertown Daily News)

Testimony from former student at Chrysalis Boarding School

This testimony was found on another blog. All rights goes to the original owner.

"There are so many things I have conflicting feelings concerning

I came to Chrysalis the very last day of August, 200X. I had just completed a very grueling wilderness program (I mean grueling! So much so that it was recently closed down and is still involved in a class action suit) and had never before been west of the Mississippi. My dad and I pulled up to the main house, and were first greeted by Kenny (owner)...who showed my dad and I around. He was so nice and seemed much like my dad. I immediately felt safe. I realize later that this is more for show when the parents are present.

I was then separated from my dad and my personal belongings were searched. I was very vaguely walked through some of the basic rules - there are SO many rules that its impossible to keep track. Most people would think that perhaps a rulebook would be appropriate when they're are several dozen rules to follow, but at Chrysalis, you are on your own. I was "called out" on these in the most humiliating fashion a few days later.

I told my dad goodbye. I did so in a very casual fashion, as if I would be speaking to him very soon again. Little did I know that my conversation with my parents would go from daily (the way it had been for the past 17 years of my life) to 45 minutes, once per week. Oh, and that every word was monitored by my therapist.

It was very difficult to become adjusted to, but I began to blend in with Chrysalis life. It was so difficult to learn every name! I actually began to enjoy my new environment.
I met with my first therapist (who was very cold and harsh) - not a pleasant experience, and started school.

In Chrysalis there are three "levels" that you work through in order to graduate from the 18-24 month (typically) program. Girls may be on a particular level anywhere from 6 months to a year. With each level comes different privileges, and responsibilities. At level one, I was restricted to going to school on the Chrysalis property (home schooling), while some girls on level two, and three were permitted to attend LCHS.

There were always four therapists at Chrysalis, each girl had one of the four. Every girl that each therapist had (usually about 8-10 girls) was considered a group that met twice a week for "circle" - our group therapy sessions. In addition to our group circles, we had a "house" circle (all girls in a particular house - there were 2 main residences) or a "big" circle (every girl) that the owners (Kenny and his wife Mary) would be present in.

In the circle we would talk about "business" (ex: I would raise my hand, and once called on would mention that who ever's weekly chore was cleaning the classroom bath, that they needed to step up on replacing the toiletries), and then would talk about deeper stuff....which would always be about how some girls were doing. Very rarely were some girls praised...typically circle was for holding girls accountable for whatever they were doing wrong.

My first circle was absolute hell. I remember several therapists "calling me out" for my behavior (which I didn't know I was exhibiting) and little rules I had been breaking all week. The girls, there were around 20+ that night, all staring at me at once, took turns telling me what I was doing wrong all week. I will never forget what some of the girls said to me. I felt humiliated, and cried.

I was put on gag order from one of my roommates, called "ten feet"...in which we couldn't communicate whatsoever indefinitely. From that moment on, until nearly a year later, when I decided to run away....my every waking moment was spent walking on eggshells.

Your behavior is modified in such a way that rather than looking for something admirable in your fellow Chrysalis girls, you would begin to look for every flaw in character or behavior, and rather than having direct communication in private about this, you were encouraged to bring these things up in circle...so that the person in question would be subjected to humiliation, and feelings of shame as they are publicly embarrassed, in front of other student and staff.

We were made to write in journals, at least one page everyday - and it was checked everyday. Each week you are required to give your journal to your therapist, who reads them, and writes in them...with red corrective ink (not kidding).

I still have all of my journals...and I've read them since I've been out. Everything I wrote was very fake, and not how I genuinely felt. I couldn't use my journal as an outlet because of the monitoring. Every element of our lives was monitored....either by staff of every girl.

Back to the rules...when you break a rule, such as forgetting to perform your chore for the day, or not making your bed up to par, you were given a consequence. At the end of the week, you are required to perform duties for your consequences. My favorite was scraping out the cracks in the wood floor with toothpicks.

I was sent to Chrysalis for behavioral problems and substance abuse. Due to the severity of my addiction, it was essential for me to attend AA meetings every week. Each Friday night we were allowed to go into town and attend these meetings if we needed it. My therapist thought so, and I certainly never debated it - I traveled a very hard road before I arrived at Chrysalis, by the time I arrived I had finally realized that I had a major problem.

BUT, if myself, or another girl with substance abuse history had consequences at the end of the week, we were made to stay home and perform our consequences rather than attending a meeting.

I'm all for missing out on watching a movie, or having my down time in order to perform a consequence....but missing an AA meeting when you're an addict can be a very big problem.

We were nearly all medicated and it was highly encouraged. I began taking a medication for my depression and anxiety disorder.

So for the next several months I was the epitome of a perfect Chrysalis girl. I had straight A's in school, did my chores very well, was very forthcoming in my therapy, any making a lot of progress. I graduated to level two, and was allowed more privileged. At levels two and three we are allowed "visits" to go home and see our families. The higher our level the more time we are allowed to go home, and more often.

However, the first time I saw my parents after entering Chrysalis, was just a few months into the program. I was still a level one...so my parents came to see me during Thanksgiving.

They stayed in Eureka but I was not allowed to stay with them overnight, and was only allowed to spend time with them for a certain amount of time each day. Even during Christmas some girls were not allowed to leave the school and were not able to see their families.

I recall one of the girls being "pulled out" (though she was really forced to leave by the owners) of the program because her mother wanted to see her more often than the owners would allow.

At level two we were allowed to communicate with certain extended family members and friends, as long as they were "approved". To be approved meant that they had to lead healthy, drug free lives. I only had two friends that were deemed to be approved, and would write to them via snail mail.

I flew to my grandparent's house and spent Christmas with my family members. I had just become a level two (at record time) and was expected to follow every little rule while off campus (couldn't wear eyeliner or listen to unapproved music or watch unapproved television - anything with curse words, drug references, etc.). Once I returned to Chrysalis after my visit, I began to change.

I missed my family more and more everyday...and the real world was something that had become some distant and unreal to me that I longed for it so much. I still progressed very quickly and well in the program, but had increasing feelings of depression, and wanting to run away.

Running away was something that rarely happened at Chrysalis, mainly because there wasn't anywhere to run, but that didn't stop some girls. The first girl who ran away while I was there was a level one - who hadn't been there but about two months. It was just after Christmas, and the temperature was subzero, with several inches of snow on the ground. This girl, whom we'll call Betsy, decided it was dire enough to leave in just a light jacket, jeans, and her Ugg boots in the middle of the night while everyone was asleep.

You probably know that there isn't much of anything in the several miles between the school and the town, and what Betsy did could have bee fatal. But a stranger picked her up and she somehow was obtained by her family several days later. They never told us any details about it - they probably didn't want us to get any ideas.

When a girl would run the therapists and owners would announce it in an emergency circle, and would then describe the girl as having betrayed us...that what she did was an "F*** you" to all of us...and we then began to hate her for it...though I remember being secretly jealous of her for her new found freedom.

I became a very highly respected girl and that means that Mary and Kenny would like you more. Without our parents, we all seemed to be desperately trying to be in their good graces, and fighting for their attention...as if we needed to feel like beloved daughters...a feeling we couldn't have first hand with our own parents while at Chrysalis.

All the girls were pushed to have a deeper spirituality. Many of us came from different religious backgrounds...Buddhist, Jewish, Christian, etc. I was raised Catholic. However we weren't allowed to attend worship services that were available in Eureka that we may choose. Instead of going to a Catholic church (which I would had have preferred), we had to go to the Episcopalian church - and EVERY girl had to go...even if you were sick.

SO to fast forward to how I fell from grace at Chrysalis...it happened in June of 2006. I had started to become extremely honest with my therapist (which by the way, was my third therapist in a matter of months....for some strange reason the staff had a very high turn over rate...hmmmm.....) about my feelings of wanting to leave...or run away. She didn't really pay that much attention to it though oddly enough, because running away was the biggest mistake you could possibly make.

I would break down into tears at random and wouldn't calm down until I spoke to her about it. It was very overwhelming, but it became a little better over the next few months leading up to my departure. I honestly wanted to graduate from the program...I didn't want to mess up. I was desperate for the feeling to ease up.

I had a scheduled visit with my parents (my very first home visit) in May and was SO very excited. It was everything I could have hoped for. As my father dropped me off at the airport, we held each other and cried. I had an overwhelming feeling of dread. As I walked to my gate I waited for our boarding call, and once it came...I decided to run. My bags made it back to Chrysalis, but I never did. I called a friend to come pick me up and I never boarded the flight. I disappeared for several days, and resurfaced to frantic family members and a VERY pissed off Mary and Kenny.

***By the way, I turned 18 ... while at Chrysalis and Mary and Kenny and the school staff forced my parents into making me sign some sort of legal document that essentially said that I was unfit to care for myself and extend my parent's guardianship until I was 19 years old - I found out later that it would never hold up in court and that the document was essentially null and void***

My personal items were never returned and they initially refuse to give my parents their money back for the tuition they payed in advance for time I was no longer there (legal action compelled them to pay up, however). My parents were initially infuriated with me, but after they too were subjected to Mary and Kenny's wrath, they began to realize that what they had so wanted for me had never been real.

I was set to go to the University of Montana that fall, I'd been accepted before I ran, and wanted to finish my high School career in Montana. In order to have the six month requirement, I would have to finish at LCHS. My parents agreed that it was best. We developed a plan by renting a place for me to live by myself in Eureka, a new car, and everything I needed.

Mary and Kenny however were furious and threatened me not to come back to the town. I still loved them, and held out hope that they still loved me. So I did something that no girl in the school's history had ever done....I asked to come back to let the girls talk to me, and me to them.

I wanted them to have the closure they needed, and I didn't want them to hate me or feel uncomfortable when they saw me around town - I wanted them to know I was still the same girl they knew...I was asking them for something I used to dread...I wanted one final circle, and it was going to be all about me.

As I walked up to the main house for the first time in months, I was different in appearance...I had dropped weight (you were scrutinized for wanting to have control over your body by taking smaller portions..you had to eat a certain amount, nothing less - I know, I was called out for it several times) and had a tan.

Yet, I still wore light makeup and appropriate clothing, as if I were still a student. I was greeted (rather, my father was greeted modestly and me not at all) by Mary and Kenny and escorted into an empty room. Moments later the girls filed in, with not one smile. They had stone faces. I began by breaking into tears and telling them the truth...that what I did was impulsive, not planned...that I never meant to hurt them. I could tell that they had already been prepped for this moment. They spoke to me like I was a different person, an evil person. My best friends were ripping me a new one. After an hour of this, I wanted so badly to hug them...but they were excused and filed out. Not one hugged me, told me that they forgave me....nothing.

Mary and Kenny never once acknowledged my existence, never made eye contact....not once. I cried myself to sleep that night.

I finished out high school a LCHS and moved on the college. I'm 21 now, and though I've reconnected with my Chrysalis friends, it took them leaving/graduating for them to be able to freely talk to me and be real about their feelings. AT my final circle they hadn't been allowed to.

Over the past few years I've learned later that while I was there, (I learned this first hand from the girls themselves) there had been sexual relationships between some of the girls (secretly), drugs snuck into the school and used on campus, inappropriate relationships between councilors and students, etc.

What they're trying to accomplish at that school is very admirable and good, but how they're going about it is detrimental and abusive. It needs to change.

I feel certain that there are several former students whom attended with me, would be willing to speak to you about their experiences - as well as former staff members.

Things that have occurred at the school have festered and angered me over the last few years of my life.

The mission and intentions of Chrysalis are very honorable, and good for young women.

I think they've strayed from their morality and ethics as therapeutic professionals. Things need to change. But know that in many ways they did help me, teach me, and opened my eyes.

They saved my life. I was slowly killing myself with high risk behaviors, and though their methods may not be what is best, they want to help girls like me. They did help me. I think we owe it to struggling young girls who will have Chrysalis in their future, that they will get more out of it than I did, because it could have been better. We could help their success rate. Sadly, many of the girls (even graduates) have reverted back to their old behavior.

I'm part of a very small percentage who actually "get it", and have excelled. I still use some of what Chrysalis has taught me in my daily behavior - especially in my spirituality and how I've learned to treat people and treat myself. That started with that program.

Chrysalis has the potential to be incredible, with a near perfect success rate.


Sources:

• The original testimony
• The school on the 1000 places You don't want to be as a teenager blog
• Factsheet about the program (Fornits Wiki)