I was sent to Heartlight over 10 years ago.
It helped me to stop stereotyping people, and I formed life long friendships with both residents and staff.
When I arrived, I was so angry, I wouldn't even look at my parents. When I left, I was cheery and outgoing. I came back home after 15 months and made new friends which led to my joining a garage band. This angered my parents who have always considered my passion for singing a waste of time.
They claimed I was using drugs, which was unfounded and untrue. They made the decision to send me back to Heartlight after only being home for 3 months. Mark Gregston decided to be my counselor for my 2nd time there. I was back for 2 months and in that time, I saw him once. He cancelled all the other sessions. I was eventually kicked out for trying to runaway. A couple of months later, my first roommate died. Being adopted, then sent away twice, hurt so much more than it helped.
To this day my parents and I have a very strained relationship and most of it is because of Heartlight. Oh, and I went to jail twice for weed after my Heartlight stay. I didn't even smoke before I went to Heartlight either time. I was very close with my first roommate and the marijuana had a lot to do with numbing the pain I felt from her absence. Every single person I was at Heartlight with has expressed the same view. It hurts more than helps.
I truely believe when Gregston first started this, it was to help people. Now, the other residents I lived with and even some of the staff I'm still in touch with believe this is all about the money for him. Want proof? He named a cabin after my friend Caroline who passed away (and who was also sent to the program twice), then changed the name after someone who donated a ton of money to the organization. Also, if the parents aren't willing to take part and heal themselves, this program has no chance in working. If drugs are involved, this place will not help whatsoever. They do not follow a 12 step program.
Since it was founded Heartlight Ministries has been the focus of a number of campaigns where relatives and friends try to get teenagers released. Also a number of teenagers have tried to escape. Punishment reported includes being forced to wear orange jumpsuits like prison inmates.
Sources:
- “Think twice!” (The original testimony on Judy's book)
- Datasheet about the facility (Fornits Wiki)
I suppose I should start from the beginning. I was admitted to Heartlight against my will at age 15 because I was flunking out of school due to depression because of molestation from my stepfather. The first house they put me in was called South House. The first thing I noticed is that the staff members weren't much older than the residents. They showed cruel favoritisms and even hazed us one night by blindfolding us, walking us through the property, and smashing all kinds of food (eggs, breadcrumbs, etc.) in our faces and hair. This might not sound like a significant complaint, but I was in a situation where I was being bullied by other residents and had nowhere to turn to because I was being bullied by staff. Another resident Rachel Gracey was especially targeted as well. Staff and residents alike would sabotage our chores and hide things in our belongings so that whatever privileges we had to look forward to, were taken away and we would be forced to do manual labor in orange jumpsuits as if we were prisoners.
ReplyDeleteHeartlight consists of a 6 level program. I made it to level 3 pretty rapidly, but after that my progress stood at a standstill for over a year, and I couldn't figure out why. Girls who misbehaved and made less progress were awarded with public schooling and visits home while I was not. Finally, one day, my counselor (my second counselor; the first one was fired about 4 months into my stay) set up a meeting with me outside if our arranged time. She sat me down, and explained to me that she was getting fired, but before she left, there were a few things I needed to know. She told me that my family told police detectives that I had lied about the molestation, and that's why it was never investigated. She said that my grandfather had been making large donations and extra payments to Heartlight so that they would keep me there until I turned 18 (that would be 2 1/2 years for a supposedly 9-12 month program), and she told me a few other really devastating things about my family. I was absolutely shattered, and I don't think it's a coincidence how sick I became shortly after.
About two weeks after this news I had uncontrollable thirst and urination. I begged and begged my staff to book me a doctors appointment, but instead I was punished for "skipping out on activities for bathroom visits". I even wet myself and my bed a couple of times, and the bullying got really bad because of it. After 3 weeks of this they finally got me into a clinic. They took a urine sample and sent me on my way. As we were about to enter our van in the parking lot, a nurse ran in a full sprint after us and said I needed to come back in immediately. They sat me down and told me that I'm a type 1 diabetic and that an ambulance was on it's way. In the hospital they found that I was in diabetic keto-acidosis and I was in the ICU for days. I almost died.
Every resident at Heartlight had their own binder. None of us had access to ours, but they left mine in my hospital room. It was full of lies cover to cover. From my application that my autistic mother filled out, to weekly staff updates full of excuses why I needed to be in that orange jumpsuit.
Heartlight does a great job of "preparing" families for crazy things residents might say to get sent home. I cried on every weekly phone call for 18 months, and not even being diagnosed with diabetes was a good enough reason for me to experience the comfort of home.
After I returned home, I was even contacted by a male staff member who sent me explicit pictures of himself. I seriously doubt these staff members had to go through a background check.
This is just the tip of the iceberg.
I suppose I should start from the beginning. I was admitted to Heartlight against my will at age 15 because I was flunking out of school due to depression because of molestation from my stepfather. The first house they put me in was called South House. The first thing I noticed is that the staff members weren't much older than the residents. They showed cruel favoritisms and even hazed us one night by blindfolding us, walking us through the property, and smashing all kinds of food (eggs, breadcrumbs, etc.) in our faces and hair. This might not sound like a significant complaint, but I was in a situation where I was being bullied by other residents and had nowhere to turn to because I was being bullied by staff. Another resident Rachel Gracey was especially targeted as well. Staff and residents alike would sabotage our chores and hide things in our belongings so that whatever privileges we had to look forward to, were taken away and we would be forced to do manual labor in orange jumpsuits as if we were prisoners.
ReplyDeleteHeartlight consists of a 6 level program. I made it to level 3 pretty rapidly, but after that my progress stood at a standstill for over a year, and I couldn't figure out why. Girls who misbehaved and made less progress were awarded with public schooling and visits home while I was not. Finally, one day, my counselor (my second counselor; the first one was fired about 4 months into my stay) set up a meeting with me outside if our arranged time. She sat me down, and explained to me that she was getting fired, but before she left, there were a few things I needed to know. She told me that my family told police detectives that I had lied about the molestation, and that's why it was never investigated. She said that my grandfather had been making large donations and extra payments to Heartlight so that they would keep me there until I turned 18 (that would be 2 1/2 years for a supposedly 9-12 month program), and she told me a few other really devastating things about my family. I was absolutely shattered, and I don't think it's a coincidence how sick I became shortly after.
About two weeks after this news I had uncontrollable thirst and urination. I begged and begged my staff to book me a doctors appointment, but instead I was punished for "skipping out on activities for bathroom visits". I even wet myself and my bed a couple of times, and the bullying got really bad because of it. After 3 weeks of this they finally got me into a clinic. They took a urine sample and sent me on my way. As we were about to enter our van in the parking lot, a nurse ran in a full sprint after us and said I needed to come back in immediately. They sat me down and told me that I'm a type 1 diabetic and that an ambulance was on it's way. In the hospital they found that I was in diabetic keto-acidosis and I was in the ICU for days. I almost died.
Every resident at Heartlight had their own binder. None of us had access to ours, but they left mine in my hospital room. It was full of lies cover to cover. From my application that my autistic mother filled out, to weekly staff updates full of excuses why I needed to be in that orange jumpsuit.
Heartlight does a great job of "preparing" families for crazy things residents might say to get sent home. I cried on every weekly phone call for 18 months, and not even being diagnosed with diabetes was a good enough reason for me to experience the comfort of home.
After I returned home, I was even contacted by a male staff member who sent me explicit pictures of himself. I seriously doubt these staff members had to go through a background check.
This is just the tip of the iceberg.